Hip Hop Lyrics, As Explained by a Middle-Aged Mother
Lyric: The AP goin’ psycho, my Rollie goin’ brazy
-Post Malone
Meaning: If you are going to drop $20K on a Audemars Piguet watch, it shouldn’t go psycho. It should tell time, like watches are supposed to do. I own a watch from the Fossil store and it has worked perfectly fine since 1992. Also, to prove the point that he’s rich, apparently Post owns a Rolex which has also lost its damn mind. Perhaps he should file a products liability suit since nothing he owns is working. Does he have insurance? I think he needs to just get a wall clock.
Lyric: I’ve been workin’ this graveshift, and I ain’t made shit
I wish I could buy me a spaceship and fly past the sky.
-Kanye West
Meaning: Poor Kayne is working a night shift at a factory and isn’t doing well financially, so he dreams of flying into space to get away from it all like a 3rd grader or insane person. New flash, Kanye. You have millions of dollars and you can actually afford to buy a spaceship. But it’s probably wise instead of blasting off into space where there is no gravity or margaritas to simply take a vacation to the Caribbean. You probably own an island there already. Perhaps you and Post could get together and roll around in your dollar bills together. Like on a Saturday after brunch. #besties #moneymoney
Lyrics: Motherfucker, shut the fuck up when I’m talkin, lil bitch.
I’m sorry, wait, what’s your talent? Oh critiquin’
-Eminem
Meaning: I think somebody may need to take some anger management classes. Cursing doesn’t make you a bigger man, Marshall Mathers. Music critics have feelings too. And is there some aversion you have to adding “g” to the ends of words? I don’t know what you have against this letter since it can stand for either “gangster” or “a thousand dollars,” which both appear in your songs frequently. Money is clearly important to hip hop stars. See above.
Lyrics: Bring that ass, bring that ass, bring that ass back!
B-bring that ass, bring that ass, bring that ass back!
-Drake
Meaning: I believe this is a term of endearment, like “Oh no! You left too soon! Please return as quickly as possible!” However, since someone’s ass is obviously attached to them, I don’t think you have to specifically refer to it by name. “Please! Don’t forget your arms! Also your ears!” See? Not necessary. It just naturally follows along. This statement is repeated for maximum effect, although it looks a little desperate. One time would have probably been enough, Drake. It’s a wee bit stalkerish.
Lyrics: I bought a franchise to double up the profits (franchise!)
We make a landslide chopper get to popping (landslide!)
What’s in my vault? Load of cash and assaults (brrr)
I put a lab in my loft (lab)
-Migos
Meaning: I feel like there’s a sidekick here who just repeats whatever the first guy says. Franchise! Landslide! He said lab! It’s cold in here! Brr! From what I’m gathering, apparently homeboy here bought a McDonalds so that he could increase his investment portfolio. There is a reference to a chopper, which I doubt means helicopter but some sort of weapon that’s shooting at things. So a landslide of bullets? That’s dangerous. The sidekick doesn’t feel like fully explaining this and is stuck on just repeating the word. Later, he brags about his level of cash and more weaponry, and puts a lab inside of his loft, which I don’t think is legal or safe and probably doesn’t smell as good as a lavender diffuser.
Lyrics: I came, I saw, I conquered.
From record sales, to sold out concerts
So muh’fucker if you want this encore
I need you to scream til your lungs get sore.
-Jay Z
Meaning: The man has a good point. He has done great things and sold many albums and has made quite a name for himself. Mainly, he got Beyonce to marry him. Bravo, good fella. So scream for the man if that strokes his ego. I’d say he’s earned it.
